So the people have spoken, and without further ado, I present you with the Mad Libs – Hot Heat responses.Prepare your hearts, minds, and souls for ratchetry.
The first is from @metroadlib, a fellow blogger (and damn good one, at that) over at the fooler initiative.
It was hot as Satan’s nut-meat in the city. Angela found her mind wandering about ways she could cool off, and fiddled with her dress sequins, partly out of nervousness, but also to take her mind off of the scorching heat. She looked up and saw Mark from her swinger’s club standing on the subway platform, with his tie slightly pulled down to let his adam’s apple breathe. He looked so good he was damn near edible. He gave her a nod, and she mouthed “Nice tie,” the wind breezing across her face as the train whirred past. “What’s good,” he queried as the bells chimed and the doors opened.
They stepped into the packed train car, sandwiched between a wheel-chair bound paraplegic and two screaming old bitches. “I’m fine, what’s new with you?”
“Oh you know, it’s hotter than a fat man’s nipple outside, so I’m just tryna chill, and keep from going on a homicidal rampage.” Mark replied coolly. Angela was chest to chest with Mark, and was hoping he didn’t feel her Tourette’s-induced thumping. Her purse vibrated. Sh*t, I thought I left my mucous-mouthed, rabid hamster at home! She ignored the buzzing from her bag and continued to make small talk.
“So what do you do to stay all not-murder-y?” she asked. “Well,” he said, “I like to strip completely naked, and then I get really nasty, I mean, porno nasty and baste the length of my body in Skippy chunky peanut butter.” There was a long silence. Her purse continued to hum. She’d never really noticed before how fucked up his mind was. Standing that close in a hot subway train will make you realize it, though.
*Flavor Flav voice* Woooooooooooooooooooooow.